so this year with working, i discovered that i have some issues with self esteems vs previous body issues.  i think listening to Cassey & Pop pilates has made me content & okay with my body. but now i have self doubt & lack of confidence. i talked to troy & my mom & realized that not having feedback from my supervisor is harder on me then i had thought.

however, as i wrap up this school year, i know i have finally found my groove & know how to do it better next year. i know that i won't need to spend hours & hours of physical run around energy & mental energy to start up the year. 

so i had a issue arise with work. i was feeling frustrated that lynn only talks to me when there is a problem. she hasn't visited my classes or shows any interests in who i am as a teacher. i was feeling frustrated that i felt like i had to judge my character to her....but now a week later, i'm feeling much better.

i realize it is far better that she is hands off & it is a sign that she trusts me & thinks i'm doing okay. 

as the school year is unraveling, it is moving so fast. we are getting ready for the baseball game. i hate this event. i hate the whole day. i hate that i have to "work/help" it's not my stupid event & i am expectated to help.  i wish i didn't have to pay since i have to help.  we have to get there early & help set up, help clean. and then watch the stupid game.

i'm hoping if i can let lose & vent here that i will have a more positive attitude on saturday. i'm really really happy that this event is not in august anymore.  get it over & done with in the summer. 

that's a huge bonus

On the eve of my last class, I'm finding myself full of emotions. I surprised to find myself a little sad to be finished since I won't see these kids again. I'm so beyond happy to be fine working, I actually feel guilty.
Them I feel frustration for not knowing if the locks will be working or there tomorrow.