On the eve of my last class, I'm finding myself full of emotions. I surprised to find myself a little sad to be finished since I won't see these kids again. I'm so beyond happy to be fine working, I actually feel guilty.
Them I feel frustration for not knowing if the locks will be working or there tomorrow.

I've also made it thru the busiest week of my year! YAY! troy has been a HUGE help this week. I need to make sure to tell him this!

Starting to look ahead to next year, definitely need to make some big changes.  Now there won't be a Walk thru event at church next year, so that's one thing off the plate. 

I need to move art, if possible

if possible need to move my new class starting either forward or back a week. 

so let's see...about to start he busy week of my year.  no seriously.  I don't want to sound whiny but damn there is a ridiculous amount of stuff.

Monday- art 

Tuesday- work/ drop off Chili at POP during school pick up 

Wednesday- art/staff lunch at POP

Thursday-work double class (new class) 9-2pm! YIKES!  show booth & lysa dinner

Friday- vet, drop cookies & money box off at 1pm. Work show 5pm.  

Saturday-Walk thru the bible 9-12:30, drop boomie off at booth at 1pm.  

Sunday- xenia pick up 

monday- peace

tuesday- no class, nails done & library

Wednesday-

Thursday- double class (easy dinner)

Friday lunch duty, double stephanie appt. 

i was just reading some of my past entries. reflecting on how things have changed in my head, since i took my job.  how things are going so much better. so much smoother.  I do plan out 2 months at a time. & do the prep work in bulk.  i've found it easier (or know the right places to look for ideas) to come up with simple cute ideas.  I don't really think about the class until sunday night - when i wonder if i have a book & craft ready or do i need to do any prep.  I think about it briefly on monday night before bed & that's it.

it's really wonderful.  I really needed to give myself the permission to have a learning curve.  Now i'm over it & think i'm doing great

But reading over the summer stuff- i wanted to reflect that it was a GREAT SUMMER.  i didn't dawdle as much online & really tried to make "game plans" the night before.  Talking the day out ahead of time with the kids- really helped.  Looking forward to another fun summer...soon!

okay so i'm maybe 5 classes into the tuesday class. i can't believe how different it feels that the first time around.  I'm not sure if it's just the kids, the fact that the 9am is almost all 2.5 years old.  Or the structure of the class. I'm almost feeling bored in the class. that's a crazy thought!

it is running so smoothly, i can't remember what specifically stressed me out last time.

i really feel good about having a structure & game plan.  I feel like i've told the parents expectations up front.  I even remind the parent's that they signed up to help. first time around i barely knew who was helping.  i never really checked it for my personal use.

the projects are going well. i think it helps that i've added more songs & movement. less story books- i actually shorten some of the books still. having the props for reading helps too. 

Awesome moment- it's what IT is all about

yesterday, things were moving down hill for carlie.  she hadn't eaten enough food by the time i saw her after school. she was very frustrated with her snack that i brought.  We went to the ortho- she was still very crabby at the end. we had 30 mins to fill before art. not enough time to run home & get another snack.  too cold to be outside.  

We went to norma's coffee, the kids had blueberry muffins, i had a cafe au lait & we played hang man for 30 mins.  i stayed off my phone & focused on them.  Carlie was very funny & clever. casey enjoyed being able to finally understand the game.

NEED to do more stuff like this.

i'm having anxiety attacks over feeling inadequate & indecisive about the parent tot classes.  I am back to worrying about how the class is a one shot deal, what if it sucks . what if what i have planned is lame.  I'm not sure how to stop myself from self doubt.  I try to remind myself 3 things:

1. the class is only 45 minutes

2. this content is good enough for my other classes, why not PT?

3. Parents do not want mess or complicated projects.  Want something fast & easy & child friendly.

I'm hoping that if i confirm & buy the items needed for the next couple of parties i can begin to relax again.